EVANS, Alexandra Lily

[alexandra]

• Alexandra LILY EVANS •
How could you, how could you,
how could you hate me?
When all I ever wanted to be was you?
How could you, how could you, how could you love me?
When all you ever gave me were open wounds?

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I KNOW THAT I'M ALIVE
the basics
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full name, Alexandra lily evans.
1990's or 1970's? 1990’s.
nicknames, alex.
age, between eighteen and nineteen.
birthday, 8/12/78.
year, seventh.
house, slytherin.
blood status, half-blood.
wand, sixteen inches, dragon heart string, black ironwood.
broom, a nimbus 2000.

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WHEN YOU CALL ON ME
the appearance
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hair color, auburn.
eye color, black.
height, five feet and eleven inches
weight, one hundred ten pounds.
general appearance Alex is tall, almost abnormally so for a woman, as she stands at an inch or two above six foot. She is also extremely skinny, both traits she inherited from her father. Her hair is about shoulder-length at longest, and auburn in color; it looks almost as if someone took a lawnmower to it, with the way almost every strand is some different length. This she inherited from her mother (the color, not the crazy lengths). She also shares her father’s back eyes, along with his pale skin, though hers lacks any sallow-ness and is simply extremely pale.

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WHEN YOU REACH FOR ME
the personality
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likes, Women, Quidditch, sports, reading, writing, being told she’s like her father, getting good marks, being right, having her father be proud of her, brewing a complex potion correctly for the first time.
dislikes, Men, snow, rain, not being able to fly, being compared to her mother, disappointing her father, failing (whether in school or in life), horribly messing up a potion, her mother, her half-brother and his friends.
strengths, Potions, her razor-sharp mind, her skills with logic, and her prowess on a broom.
weaknesses, Herbology, anything to do with emotions, her fiery temper, the fact that she is emotionless at times, not being able to express her emotions very well.
worst fear, her father hating her, and/or her father’s death.
boggart, When Alex was ten, her father was teaching her how to brew a simple potion, but which could easily be deadly if brewed incorrectly. She doesn’t remember exactly which it was, but she remembers wanting to get it perfectly right, and knowing that her father might just praise her if she did get it right. So great was her want to please her father by brewing the potion correctly, that she made a rather horrible mistake. This resulted in nothing less than the potion exploding. Even though she was almost too shocked to speak, let alone react, Alex remembers what happened after that most clearly of all. She watched as her father’s face darkened and twisted with rage – and then everything seemed to slow down as he struck her, backhanded her, hard across the face. He said nothing, but left her laying there, the left side of her face slowly bruising and swelling. Though he apologized after a few days of cold silence between them, the moment is forever burned into Alex’s memory.
amortenia, Books (both old and new); her Quidditch robes after they’d been freshly laundered during her school days; most potions as they brew; and the cold, clean scent of the wind as it rushes past as she rides her broom.
sexuality, lesbian.
overall personality, At times, Alex is emotionless, cold, and distant. That’s only when she feels threatened, however – like she's being accused, like she has to defend herself with everything she has, including her sharp tongue. Outside of these situations, however, she’s a tiny bit more open. Though, due to her upbringing in a very emotionally cold home, Alex is reserved with her feelings, and expressions. She’s most reserved about her sexuality, and slightly with sexuality in general, though that doesn’t bother her as much. She is also good at concealing her feelings behind a mask, but will only do so if she doesn’t trust herself with what she really feels.

She's just a tad arrogant about her strengths, and quite vehement about keeping any weakness she has hidden. Alex is often bitter about the fact that people seem to have an aversion to her, but hides it well with stinging words and acidic glances. To put it simply, she's quite hurt on the inside, and hates herself for it. So, she turns her hate outward. It may seem cliché that she enjoys making others hurt as much as she does – not to mention petty – but Alex's cynicism is really the root of this. She believes that everyone will betray her eventually, even her own family.

Extremely manipulative, Alex will do almost anything to gain power for herself. However, this is contradicted by the fact that she knows that those whom she fears (her father and the Dark Lord) have power over her. She hates that, but being as good at schooling her expression and keeping her emotions hidden as she is, she doesn’t let on what she feels. (Though knowing that the Dark Lord is a skilled Legilimence, she has improved her Oclumency a great deal to counteract this.) Also, whenever her issues are in danger of being discovered, she will withdraw from everyone, and not speak with anyone until the suspicion as passed.
Despite the fact that she contradicts herself with parts of her personality, one thing will always remain constant: she holds equal amounts of respect, fear, and love for her father above everyone else.

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WHEN YOU BLESS THE DAY
the history
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mother & family, Lily Evans; Alex doesn’t know any of her mother’s family, and dislikes her half-brother.
father &family, Severus Snape; her father has no family, as both his parents have passed away.
siblings, None.
overall history, Alex tends to be rather shy at first, and compulsively paranoid when in a new place. But, she will open up once she gets to know a person, and she will become more relaxed once she gets to know a place. When in a crow of unfamiliar people, she would often rather be a wall-flower and just observe. If she knows even one person, however, she will latch onto that person. Though she won’t say much, if anything, she’ll be said person’s silent shadow. She has few friends, as she tends to be quite forthright with her words.

She is often very brutally honest, brusquely blunt, even. Should the time call for it, however, she can be serious as the rest of them. She also takes it upon herself to protect her friends, often though they don't need it, and sometimes at the risk of her own life. Alex can also be quite snappish when irritated. She has a sunny personality most of the time, but on her bad days, that same sun can be scorching. When confronted about something she has a sore spot for, she will both retreat back into herself, and merely stare unnervingly until she is left alone, or she will lash out and make sure her cutting words take suspicion off of the original topic.

Also, though her friends have tried their hardest, she tends to be quite anti-social – often, she likes it that way. She would do anything to make her father proud, but not for any other reason than that she wants him to love her again. Ever since she started Hogwarts, and especially since her third year, Alex has hated change, which made her very resistant to many things in her life. However, oddly enough, she surprised even herself when she accepted her lesbianism without a second thought. Being slightly indecisive, Alex has yet to take sides in the current events. Though she knows where she would align herself, if she could make up had damn mind, she has yet to make her thoughts known to anyone. All in all, she’s been described as at tomboy by many, and is quite happy with this definition of her personality.

[/list]

THROUGH THE TRAPDOOR

[/b] Lily Evans Potter – Thirty-seven – Order member – Estranged.
FATHER: Severus Snape – Thirty-seven – Hogwarts Potions Master – Rather close, if awkward at times.
SIBLINGS: Elizabeth Potter, 17, Gryffindor; Harry Potter, 16, Gryffindor; ----- Potter, Gryffindor; ---- Potter, Gryffindor – Half-siblings; she doesn’t know any of them well, but knows of them.
HISTORY:Conceived in December of 1977 and born in August of 1978, Alex was most definitely not a planned baby. She was told of the circumstances surrounding her conception and birth when she was older, and Alex can’t really say she was surprised. Her mother’s then-boyfriend (now husband) James Potter was reportedly being a bigger asshole than usual, and Lily had eventually just had enough. She had been found and comforted by her long-time, though recently ex, best friend Severus at that time, and eventually one thing had led to another. Nature had taken its course, and nine months later, Alex was born.

Alex was raised by her mother and step-father until she was four years of age, at which time she was given into her father’s custody. This was mostly because of the attack by Voldemort, after which her father retrieved her. She was given her middle name and surname by her father at this time. She was given the former because she was the only part of Lily he would ever have, and the latter because she was not a Potter, but being given his surname would have directed questions and suspicions to them which none wanted to deal with. Her childhood from this point was quiet and uneventful. She never really had friends, as her magic and anti-social behavior deterred the few children of Spinners End.

She learned how to read from an early age, and her thirst for knowledge soon became tied to her father’s approval of her. If she could learn something knew from a book quickly, he would give her a few, sparse words of praise. Of course, the one thing she longed most for was to know that he was proud of her. That said, she also made it a point to be fiercely independent as she grew older; she would always only do something if she wanted to, not because others had told her to. (She was respectful, but not subservient.)

The Potion Incident marked the end of her blind devotion to her father. However, it also increased her drive to make him proud; if she would never fail in his eyes again, he would never again have cause to hurt her. When she began attending Hogwarts, she quickly understood that her situation was delicate, and to never answer personal questions – or to answer them vaguely, if she had no other choice. This was rather easily enough done, as she was anti-social anyways. She did gain a few friends, but they were never very close ones. Though, one or two did manage to get a bit closer to her by the time the year was over, much to her dislike.

Her second year was uneventful, save for the normal ups and downs of school. Alex focused on her grades mostly, and studied hard. Of course, during the spring and summer break that year, she gained awareness of her drive for sports as well, and though she would only work on her running when her school work had been completed, she did get very good and very fast rather quickly. Her third year marked the beginning of her passion for Quidditch, when she tried out for the team and was placed as chaser. Her father bought her a broom for her first game, and though her skills didn’t look very promising at first, she polished them whenever she could, even outside of practice. Of course, due to her drive to make her father proud, she still threw any energy she had left into her school work.

Her fourth year began on a bad note. As her father trusted her to keep a level head on her shoulders, Alex was allowed to enter platform 9¾ alone whenever the time called for it (at the beginning of each term, for breaks, etc). Here, she first saw the boy she had come to know was her half-brother. She recognized the boy from her father’s description, and hated him almost on sight. Resentment burned within the thirteen-year-old then, but she kept her outward appearance cold and emotionless. She also began to hate her half-siblings. It was through no fault of his own, but she hated seeing him be so openly loved by anyone, when she had to fight tooth and nail for even one word of praise from her father. She remembers clearly how she deliberately walked past him and the Weasely’s then, throwing a cold sneer their way as she did so, though she gave no other sign that she recognized them and her relationship to the boy.

Also in her fourth year, Alex came to terms with her lesbianism, and then made it a point to come out to her father. She never did know what he thought of her telling him this, as he simply nodded in recognition of her words, but she hopes that he wasn’t disappointed. Other than those two events, her fourth year was relatively quiet, though filled with the usual, everyday grind of schoolwork and Quidditch. (She had no care for the Chamber Of Secrets-related events, nor for any of the other extra-school events in later years.) Her fifth was much the same, though she was given the position of prefect, and so she found it necessary to juggle a more complicated schedule. Due to this, as she threw all of her energy into school work, Quidditch, and her prefects duties, along with studying for O.WL.s, Alex’s eating habits ended up becoming secondary. She lost a good deal of weight that year, and though it was somewhat remedied during the summer, it couldn’t be fixed very well due to her love of running.

In her sixth year, as she worked harder than ever to prepare for N.E.W.T.s in her seventh, Alex’s issues with food became worse and worse. When she was named Captain of her house Quidditch team, her schedule became even slightly crazier; or, it would have, had Quidditch been going on that year, what with the Tri-Wizard Tournament. (She still had the administrative duties of the Captain, however, so it was mostly like she had more school work to do.) Everything was brought to a crashing halt, when Alex herself crashed during a few recreational laps around the Quidditch pitch. Her eating habits were brought to light when a full examination was performed, and her injuries sustained in the crash – a broken arm, and a few fractured ribs – seemed to pale in comparison. Her status as prefect was suspended, as was her title of Captain. She was checked into St. Mungos, and spent a month there in therapy and recovery. The thing that spurred her on most to get well again was the fact that her father visited her all of one time. When he did so, he told her that, though she had never so much as disappointed him before, that now she had failed in his eyes – failed to recognize her own anorexia, and thus placed herself in danger of death.

Normally, that would have broken her. Had it been any other situation, it would have utterly and completely shattered her, as she had tied her self-worth to her father’s approval. But, it only drove her to succeed again. If her failure had been a disappointment to her father, she would make her recovery something he could be proud of. Let him say in the future, that yes, she had had a rough time with an eating disorder, but that she had never broken and pulled through with her fierce ambition and determination. When she finally returned to school, she was put on a two-week trail/probation period. If she could catch up in her school work, and prove that she wouldn’t relapse, she would be reinstated as a prefect and as Captain. She proved any and all nay-sayers wrong, and was back as Slytherin’s Captain and prefect by the time the three weeks were up.

Aside from working harder than ever to get the O’s she desired on her N.E.W.T.s, and keeping herself closely in hand to make sure she never relapsed, Alex’s seventh year was relatively uneventful. (Of course, the uneventfulness was mostly because the Dark Lord was still just gaining power, and no-one believed her stupid half-brother or the old fool of a Headmaster.) She was a bit disappointed in herself for not being named Head Girl, but was pleased enough with her accomplishments nonetheless. Her time at Hogwarts finished up in a rather uneventful manner, and for the first summer post-school, she merely enjoyed being free. However, as anything lackadaisical was inherently against her nature, Alex threw herself into a job search as soon as September rolled around. Her father quite simply saved her the trouble, by offering her a private internship. (As usual, no-one would know about it, and so they could continue to avoid any uncomfortable questions.) She accepted, and currently spends about half her time working in her father’s private potions lab in the Hogwarts dungeons, while working part time at the apothecary in Diagon Alley.

Though she finds it not the least bit embarrassing, Alex still lives with her father. This is mostly because she wishes to save her money, but also because – though she would never admit it aloud – she would miss her father a great deal if she were to have a flat of her own. Also, this is because she knows that, being the type of people that they are, they would eventually lose contact completely, despite the fact that she is his intern. All in all, it would more-than-likely devastate Alex if that were to happen. Despite the fact that she hates being emotional about such things, she knows it’s true that her father is all she has, and that she couldn’t bear to lose him.

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I GET WINGS TO FLY
the player
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name/alias, Sam.
gender, Female.
age, Seventeen.
other characters, None.
experience, Seven years.
how you found us, An add on Free Your Soul.
roleplay sample. Dreamy? No, Alex was never one to be dreamy. Consumed by her thoughts, and perhaps zoned out on occasion, yes, but never was she dreamy. What the Ravenclaw fourth year had mistaken for "dreamy" was in fact just Alex's usual, unreadable and far-off expression. Of course, what was different this time, was the fact that her eyes weren't hard and cold as they usually were. Now, they held a glint of sorrow - of haunting memories she couldn't quite shake from her expression. It was more than likely this haunted, sorrowful light that Louis had been unable to place.

Looking up when she was spoken to, Alex took in the boy. Yes, he was obviously a Weasley, but there was something... something else about him as well. Something which he must have inherited from his mother, the taller redhead concluded. Never before had she seen a semi-blonde Weasley, but then again, the newest generation was diluted anyways, so she shouldn't have been too surprised. Lowering her hands from their folded position, Alex stood and brushed off her trousers. She then looked to Luis again.

She answered him at length. "My summer was... Quiet, as it always is." There was a bit of distance in her voice; though she had a somewhat mentor-like relationship to some students, she made it a point to get close to none of them. She had heard how that had made Dumbledore unpopular, with the way he favored the Marauders during her father's time, and had seen how it played out with the Golden Trio during her own school days, even if she had been two to three years older than they.

After a moment, she answered his following words. "My thoughts were not interrupted, no..." She touched the cross she wore for a moment, before dropping her hand to her side once more. Slipping her pale, long-fingered hands into the pockets of her trousers once more, she placed a query of her own. "Do you come to study here often? I understand that it is quiet, but..." Her eyes darkened, if that were possible, with their already black coloring. "How can you stand the ghosts of the dead...?"

As a Ravenclaw, she would expect him to be able to read between the lines of what she had said. She looked down her slightly small, straight nose at him. Her gaze wasn't condescending, merely assessing. She wondered if he would come to the correct conclusion, and what he might do with the information. In all, she wondered at her own mental state, to give such of herself away, even in the roundabout way she had done it. To be succinct, she wondered at the sanity of all but outright telling this boy that she was haunted by a death, and that if he were smart enough to put two and two together, he would know that the death which haunted her was inscribed upon the headstone behind her.

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I CAN TOUCH THE SKY
the player
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[chelz]

No. Absolutely not. Not only did you NOT consult either myself or the person that plays Snape here; but, your application is not even *WORTH* reading after seeing that you decided to be the Mary Sue child of a canon relationship that never even existed and was impossible to exist because of, you know, HER DYING.

I'm rarely pissed off when I read bad apps. I'm not even bothering to read the entirety of it, since it would be a waste of my time.

Absolutely rejected.

By the FUCKING way, if Larry and I were to somehow make Snape and Lily have a child, her character wouldn't be as retarded and insipid as yours is. Learn how to roleplay.