Post by lucius on Jul 19, 2011 15:15:06 GMT -5
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] I would give it to you. The thought of keeping a journal is a maddening idea, to say in the least; but, something inside my head is telling me that it would be pertinent to keep a personal record of things that go on in my life… Of course, this doesn’t go without its precautions. Not only will this journal be hidden; but, also, protected with an array of spells in order to keep the nosey from reading it. My secrets will always be this closely guarded. Regardless, I suppose the first thing I could state is that I have taken the plunge into madness, irresponsibility and irrevocable sin. I’ve never much cared for rules, as it is; but, something about this arrangement bugs me. I’m still a civil man inside, despite the fact I haven’t listened to a single thing a gut has told me. I suppose that resisting the urges was good enough on my part, right? I can at least be commended for that. Nevertheless, I probably have made the biggest mistake of my life, and in most ways I don’t even regret it. What right do I have to, anyway? My stay in this time is most certainly not permanent… And what if I do have a romp with her? She’s my wife, not some random pair of legs that I thought looked pretty. I suppose this is a testament to how pathetic I’ve become, and how attached I was to my wife before we were separated. I think I’m going mad. What’s done is done, though. I’m not going to push, and I’m not going to shove. Things will remain as they are. Narcissa can be such a brat, though. She think she can still talk back to me, and I certainly proved that to be a false assumption, on Saturday I believe. She thought that she wouldn’t be in trouble for skipping a Saturday detention. How wrong was she? I assigned her another one for the next day, and she stated that she would promptly arrive and on time. Oh, but that wasn’t the only thing that occurred in the common room. I hate having to run into that Potter boy more than I have to, and what’s worse is that he doesn’t know how to keep his mouth shut. Neither does Bellatrix, for that matter. When did children get so insolent? I had to throw a two month detention at a blind girl, due to Potter’s idiocy. She seemed frightened of me. Good - I want them to be afraid. The Sunday after that, Narcissa popped into my office during the early morning. Silly girl thought she surprised me. How wrong she was -- I had the upper hand that time. A nice little birthday breakfast (fruits, mimosas and muffins), a cute, little kitten waiting for her affections. I honestly don’t know why I’m treating her as I do my own Narcissa… I’m not usually this accommodating this fast. But it feels too familiar to pretend otherwise. She wasn’t frightened, thankfully, and she was more than pleased to have someone pamper her for once. The rest of the morning consisted of naming the kitten (I insisted Nemesis, she wanted Echo. A rather ridiculous name, really), and doing assignments with her, as was the agreement set by me for what the detention would be. She can’t simply think that because of the circumstances I’m going to be easy on her. I’ve always believed in hard work, so she will do what she needs to earn to grade. I suppose I’ll write in this damned thing whenever something eventful happens… I’ve seen Severus around, which is a relief. Perhaps I’ll be speaking with him soon. Merlin knows I need to. For now, I should find a place to hide this thing. -Lucius |