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Post by elvishbanana2 on Jul 18, 2011 7:55:20 GMT -5
Diana’s cane swept from side to side, the sharp taps echoing around the stony hallways. Her bag slung over one shoulder, a bundle of sheet music pressed to her chest, she waited for the black-and-green cane to hit stone. Diana knew her way around Hogwarts better than anyone- or so she’d thought. But when the slim Slytherin girl had overheard a few of the seventh-years talking, she knew there was still a place she’d never been.
The Room of Requirement.
She’d heard of it, of course. Everyone had. But Diana had no idea to get in until she’d listened to the seventh-years. They’d been speaking as loud as you please, and yet again her temper had flared up. Just because I’m blind doesn’t mean I’m deaf. However clever she may have been, I am not Helen Keller, she thought bitterly.
Crack! The sound of her cane hitting stone was unmistakable. Taking a deep breath, Diana put her arm out to feel the wall. Keeping her fingers gliding along the stone, she paced across the section of wall three times, concentrating on what she wanted. A room where I can practice… A room with a piano, a place where I won’t have to worry about using Silencing charms every few moments. A room where I can practice, a room where I can practice, a room where I can practice… Diana repeated the mantra over and over, a mental plea to the mysterious Room to open for her. She had new Bach music from her sister Georgiana that she was longing to try, and her fingers itched for the smooth ivory of piano keys. Please, she thought to add on her second pass. Please, please, open for me. On the blind girl’s third pass, something remarkable happened. Her fingers brushed past the stone again, but this time it felt different. Excitement bubbling in her veins, Diana stopped and craned her neck, listening. The sound of grating stone met her ears, the wall shifting under her fingers. When the grinding noises stopped, she bit her lip. Had it truly worked?
Her fingers fluttered over the wall as she moved her arm left. Engraved stone changed radically to smooth- the door was somewhere to her right. Diana put her palm on the wall, sliding it to the right. Her fingers caught in a seam, a tiny thing easier felt than seen. That was the edge of one door- the Room of Requirement was grand enough to have double doors. Sliding her hand up and down, she searched for a handle. A smooth metal one appeared under her fingers. Diana’s mouth twitched with the ghost of a smile as she wrapped her fingers around the grip and pulled. It was lighter than it sounded- but not by much. She eased the door open slowly, too busy wondering about what she would find within to worry about whether anyone was near. As soon as the opening was large enough for the half-Russian girl to pass through, she let go, dashing inside the Room. The door remained open for a moment and began to close, but she paid little attention.
The floor under her shoes was hard, not carpeting- she guessed that it was wooden flooring, not stone. The best kind for acoustics. Taking one hesitant step after another, Diana walked into the center of the room, or so she guessed it to be. She wondered vaguely what the walls were made of, and hummed a pitch. The resounding echo was so sweet she knew the Room had given her precisely what she wanted. Even her practice room at the family estate didn’t produce such a sweet sound. She tapped her cane back and forth, blindly trying to find out what was in the room. She hit a couch once or twice, a long one with plush velvet covering. On the other side of the room, however…
A piano. And not just any piano, but a Steinway grand, just like the one she owned at home. Diana slid her black bag off of her shoulder and put it next to one of the legs, propping the cane up next to it. Easing herself onto the bench, she put her bulky music folder on the stand and turned to the piano itself. Diana’s hands floated over the top of the wonderful instrument, and she hesitated to touch. Her right thumb dropped, hitting the middle D. A wonderful, pure peal of sound reverberated around the room, and she nearly wept with joy. Her fingers swept over the smooth, cool keys into a familiar chord. He may have had Muggle blood, but Beethoven created magic all the same. Not caring whether the sound of her practicing left the Room, she started in on one of her favorite pieces- Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 4. The Allegro Moderato nearly brought tears to her milky eyes. It had been two full months since she’d been able to play like this, and to have the world of music opened up before her again this way was… moving beyond belief. Even after two months away from her beloved piano at home, the notes came easily to her, the piece one she’d known since she was a little girl. Dianna clearly remembered her Uncle Dmitri guiding her small hands across the keys, more emotion and depth packed into her mistakes than he’d ever heard in any master of the piano, or so he said when they’d finished. Dmitri loved the piano as much or more than Diana- his delight at finding a fellow pianist in his niece had prompted him to buy her piano as a birthday gift.
As she played, Diana was unable to keep from beaming. The relief she felt while playing was incredible- like she’d been mute for two months and had returned to speech in one moment. Tears of bliss rolled down her cheeks. The smooth black and white keys were like liquid under her fingers; she lost herself in the music, forgot who she was, where she was, and nearly everything else. Diana forgot that she was blind. She forgot that she was at Hogwarts. She even forgot to keep an ear cocked for listeners…
OOC: Just a quick apology- this was originally in first person, my mistake! Hope this is better xDD
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Post by eli on Jul 25, 2011 0:19:39 GMT -5
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Come crashing into my little world
Does she really need to do this to me?
He wasn't one for being all brooding, but that damn woman.. She honestly didn't know what it was doing to him.. Her treatment was KILLING HIM.. it had to be.. He felt ill, didn't he? Granted that dreadful hag in the infirmary said it was all in his head. She should really be sacked as she is dead weight god forbid if she actually has to work…. Useless as a squib..
It was dismal thoughts that he needed to put out of his mind. He had hidden his agony pretty good he thought... No one seemed to know that he was in agony over their break up.. Granted he been doing what he could to keep his mind off things..
((Doing what he could? More like WHO he could..))
But that wasn't the issue, He normally wasn't the sort to just go off the deep end and start sleeping around and acting as his father said.. 'a normal healthy man's ways' He still didn't want her to find out about it. Part of him agonized on that thought of what would happen if Diana did find out about his scandals. He didn't want to think of it, sure he could blame the booze, but he knew her well enough to know that blaming alcohol would only go so far. He could almost picture it.. Her standing their arms crossed that look of annoyed disappointment while asking If he knew that drinking made him stupid why, would he drink?
Sadly that wasn't even issue at the moment.. No, Diana didn't know about the other girls.. Hell he didn't even get a chance to rub it in her face, because it was hard to rub anything in the face of a girl who refused to even REPLY TO THE SMALLEST NOTE...
The Nerve of her... He scowled at a gaggle of Small first or second year Puffle’s (honestly at that age they all sort of blended in together)They of course parted like the red sea.. Then again he could comprehend why they were upset, He after all was practically steaming holding the last note; that been returned to him by her owl, cause she didn't even have the proper decency to give it back to him in person.. She had that Mangy vulture do it.
He had even taken the time to print it out in special bubble letters so she could read it with her fingers.. HELL HE WAS TRYING TO BE SENSITIVE. Fat load of good that got him.. What did it get him a peck on the his pinky by that bloody vulture, that’s what it got him...
Turning the corner of the thirdfloor stair case his anger having him taking the stairs two and three at a time. He was turning the corner of the fourth flight when he heard it the whispy voice that could only belong to some occupant of a painting.
"
should really slow down.. All this stinking kids whizzing past to and fro and not concerned about what the dust does to us.. ungrateful bastards, each and every one of them..."
Well that caught his attention he normally wasn't one to get into a pissing match with someone, as he knew better last thing he wanted to do is be seen acting like a one of those crazed girls whose hormone levels made them unbareble to be around. He tried to put the words out of his mind, but frankly, he couldn't as his father invested so much into the bloody walls that those pictures hung on, and to hear them attempting to boss him around... Well that was simply not going to happen...
Turning around Diana's letter crinkling in his clinching fist.. " If I hear anything of like that again out of you... I will speak with Filch to have you relocated to his bathroom you? Do you really want to spend the better part of your years watching him take a shi_____________"
He didn't see it what was to his left and up a three flights of stairs away so, by the time the first one raced past his arm it was too late to avoid the second one.. It was mid obscenity that a water balloon clobbered him... The pink offensive thing hit him somewhere in the right shoulder.. IT was hard to tell exactly where it had gotten him as its pink rubber bits were up and down his uniform jacket and the water soaking in immediately.. He knew it was no big deal as his uniform was self drying but still it was annoying to say the least.
He picked up some pink rubber off his shoulder, and placed it calmly on the frame of the offensive painting whom he knew would be helpless in removing it. Turning the corner he had obtained the satisfaction in hearing the painting bellowing after him to come back and remove the offensive plastic.. He would have to remember that in the future perhaps he could talk peeves into egging the painting, and not those of his kind.
Elijah turned the corner of the seventh floor he slowed down attempting to compose himself. He knew if he stormed in that room feeling the way he felt it would not help him, but sadly there was not solving the issue with his emotions. Diana had seen to that the moment she stopped replying to his owl’s that summer, and the fact that she was sharing HIS house, and HIS common room and not even bothering to speak to him. Was just too much for his ego.
Enough, was enough.. He would not tolerate rude behavior and certainly not from someone like her. She was privileged to have his affections, and yes he might have been a bit un-sensitive with his treatment of her inability to see.. But that was hardly someone should go and call it quits on a relationship, why would it be. IT wasn't like had a damn handicapped anything in life, Should she be that damn sensitive when he was just doing what was best?
Didn’t she just get he didn’t want to see her get hurt, or embarrass herself.. “Okay perhaps offering to help her bath wasn’t the best way to joke with her, but that is all it was, a bit of guy humor.. Okay perhaps not, but he was a guy wasn’t he. Then again he had been very kind and understanding about other things personal things that should have mattered at least a bit?
He circled the place three times as he knew where she was heading as he had to hide a box of nudie mags before Slughorn confiscated them.. To bad that he still had no idea where he left them in that clutter hell of a room…
He knew what she going in there to do, the sheet music. Was a dead give away, that and the way she seemed to be a bit calm like she was going to be going somewhere happy.. He knew her enough to know she wouldn’t close the place off to him as he had been good up till now and not hounded her with anything other than letters and notes and glances..
Her, and her music on his mind, so much so that he could almost hear the music at his ear. The strong melody captured his heart and squeezed he knew then that it wasn’t just in his head the door had opened.. It was so strange for him being there, and knowing that moments ago he had planned to just storm in there and let her have it. Sadly that was the thing with women, particularly women like Diana, they could take the strongest men, and reduce them to fragile little boys with just one action.. Like in this case watching her sit at the piano that mirrored the one she had at her home. The one he had watched her practice on countless time, the one who’s music had such a soothing effect, or in this case such a painful effect that he could do nothing but stand there and look and be in what she captured him in a horrible web of his own bad choices and the painful cost of those choices.
The wrinkled letter he had closed in a fist fell from his hands. Breaking him from the agony he felt and almost set in time to the more passionate parts of the music he leaned down, and picked up his note and with confident strides he strode up to her scowling down at her, as he knew it didn’t matter because she couldn’t see him..
Dropping the letter on her moving fingers he hissed angrily… “ YOU WILL READ THIS..”
Words like Violence breaks the Silence WORDS: 1,401 TAGGED: Banana (Diana) OUTFIT: Uniform MUSIC: Blurry, Puddle of mudNOTES Hope he will be all you want and more...Can't wait how they turn out.... template made by mikey is a lady killer ?! @ caution 2.0, steal it and she'll send zombie pandas to eat your brains! |
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Post by elvishbanana2 on Jul 25, 2011 14:01:24 GMT -5
| [atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] As she played, tears rolled down Diana’s cheeks. It was relief, blessed relief. There was no magic involved, no improvisations so she could do things without her sight. She didn’t need the magic for this. It was magic in and of itself, a promise that she didn’t need her eyes to do something beautiful. It didn’t stop her from wishing. On impulse, she played an old song, one that an old friend- she refused to so much as think his name- had always enjoyed. She hadn’t tried it in two years, since their falling-out. But she played it then, the notes coming as easily as if she’d played it the day before. He would never admit that he liked the Muggle music- but she knew he did. He never interrupted her when she played it for him, never talked or hummed in the middle. Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue- a challenging enough piece that Diana had to practice it for three years before she could get it right, even with her uncle Dmitri helping. But it was worth it. Diana swayed with the music, leaning low over the piano keys and leaning back, her tears splattering the smooth ivory. The delicate chain she wore around her neck slipped out of her shirt, and with it, the ring threaded on the chain. It was a trinket, something he’d picked up in one of the threadbare stores in Diagon Alley in their second year. She’d worn it on her finger then, and all through their fourth year. But for the past two years, she had hidden the ring away, hidden it like she’d hidden her regret. No, she thought stubbornly, faltering in the middle of the piece. It’s over. I won’t think about it, not anymore. It’s over…But there was still jade green, and the smell of cedar and sometimes of lavender, and an unspoken promise. Diana’s fingers wavered- she was alone, who cared if she stopped in the middle of the song? Putting her face in her hands, Diana took deep breath after deep breath, struggling not to burst into sobs. Green and silver- how ironic. How perfectly cruel. Diana wiped her face with her sleeve, her breathing coming easier. She put her hands on the piano again. She felt… dirty. Unclean for having spent time with another boy, whose aura was the brightest silver she’d even encountered. It was true that he wasn’t the most predictable of crushes, or the easiest. Why can they never be easy? she wondered sadly. Either they never let me forget how crippled I am- or they never remember it. That in itself provided some problems. The minute she couldn’t match him in every way, Diana’s chances with Draco were reduced to zero. She could never let him see her struggle. Her heart somewhat calmed down, Diana played again, the slow, agonizingly sad phrase of the Rhapsody. The dreamer part, her uncle called it. Eli’s favorite part of the whole song- she never knew if it was only because it was hers as well. Lost in the music, Diana couldn’t keep fat, salty tears from rolling down her cheeks. Her face felt sticky, the ring on her chest the heavy reminder of her sorrow. He didn’t even care anymore. Since they’d fallen out, he hadn’t said so much as three words to her- in two full years. No notes, no letters, no birthday cards or Christmas cards. Not so much as a tip of his hat to her. Hundreds of times, she’d taken up parchment and dictated the beginnings of letters to him- and then stopped, crumpling up the paper and throwing it at the wall. How could she possibly say what she needed to say? Before it had only been- “You’re my best friend- even if we’re not together, won’t you please be my friend? I don’t have enough to spare…” But now she had a whole other thing to say. “You’re my best friend and I need you as my friend because I don’t have many these days, and please, please don’t murder Draco Malfoy because of me, because I like him in the way I can’t like you.” How the hell was she supposed to put that in a letter? Something hit her fingers, causing her to break off in the middle of a chord. ”YOU WILL READ THIS…””Jesus Christ!” she screamed, jumping a clear two feet into the air, her hands flying up, her shoulders nearly touching her ears. A wave of fury hit her- who had the nerve to interrupt like that right in the middle of the most stirring part of the music? Who had the nerve to interrupt her, when she had blood purer than all but a handful of the Hogwarts students? Diana whipped around, the chain necklace and ring bouncing off of her sweater a few times. Ready to unleash the full force of her anger on whatever poor mortal soul stood behind her, she opened her mouth to give them a piece of her mind- and stopped short. Eli. Jade green and cedar and lavender. Her eyes got wide, her expression going instantly from “livid” to “extremely worried”. ”Eli? My god, Eli, what’s happened?” He was obviously upset- she could see his pale aura shaking. Diana narrowly resisted the urge to give him a hug, knowing that she’d wounded his pride too much to charge into things like that yet. She swiveled around so she was facing him, ignoring the piano behind her. If anyone had made her friend hurt, if anyone had dared insult him, she’d make them pay. Regardless of anything else that had happened between them, Elijah Jammison was her best friend before anyone else- talking to her and supporting her on their very first train ride to Hogwarts. She was more protective of Eli than of anyone else in the world- whoever had made him so upset would soon find themselves on the business end of her wand… Word count: 997 Wearing: UniformMusic: Rhapsody in Blue Notes: Ooh, this is gonna be so much fun! ^^ Tag: Elijah Jammison
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Post by eli on Jul 28, 2011 3:49:00 GMT -5
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Come crashing into my little world
It was shameful the way she captivated him. Well it wasn't just shameful it was truly pathetic, that sort of weakness was simply not allowed, it was a liability to harbor such strong emotions for someone. Until that moment he would never allow himself to admit he could feel such a strong emotion. Still as he stood there over her, he found himself entranced by memories that he would have stood a better chance of surviving, if he were to allow himself to forget them.
Look what she had reduced him too during her "off to discover myself" time. He had always been logical and controlled, but without her nothing made sense. He thought of how he acted with her three nights prior when he had made her run from the common room, his behavior deplorable that it made him ill to think about it.. He had simply only wanted to see if she still cared and somehow in the course of a night he had completely shoved her away.
It seemed his pride, was not only a weapon, but perhaps his own personal brand of Poison. With that poison he went about destroying his only chance at happiness. He had done it all to hurt her, and he knew that he had succeeded, but did that justify her treatment of him now. They had history after all and Elijah didn’t comprehend how or why she could just throw it all away. How she could to completely check out from him.
He had been prepared to do a lot of things the moment that door opened, He was prepared to yell, scream and hate. Sadly what he wasn't ready for was seeing her eyes tear filled. The image of it literally ripped from him the ability to breath.. It was as if she had turned around and socked him square in the stomach. It was truly a strange thing that even though he had made many mistakes in his life concerning Diana, he could never get comfortable with seeing her disappointment in him.. Letting her down was still in his mind the biggest sin possible. He would have rather found her in there pouring over some love letter without a care in the world than to find her in her current state. Finding those damning tears streaking down her cheeks, and knowing that he was the one who had put them there.
He wanted to comfort her. Just do what felt natural to him? Pull her into his arms and kiss the top of that beautiful head, and whisper that everything was going to be alright. Oh to have faith in that being an option, that he could make everything better. He didn’t know why he could just not be honest with her.. Four the past 5 years from the time he had met her she was the only thing that he felt he could be honest with. He didn’t understand why or how that changed.
How would he recover from her hatred after the cruel lies he told in the common room, even strange was that she believed them in the first place. How could she not see her worth to him.. Did she not know that she was the hope that kept him trusting; that it could for him at least not be better than it was with her, how on earth did she believe it. And why did she not call him on it, it was her right after all, it wasn’t as if his actions garnered respect of her civil tongue.
He winced as she jumped, he hadn’t intended to frighten her, and he was simply angry and perhaps not as patient as he should have been. His eyes literally drank her in.. It was a blessing she was blind or the look he was giving her would have no doubt seen her slap the hell out of him.. Beauty like that should have been outlawed ages ago as it was only made to reduce men like him to lingering sinful thoughts..
He couldn’t stop himself he reached out to her, and ceased the silver chain that was around her neck he saw the ring that he had picked up for her as a trinket of interest.. Well that is what she called it, to him it meant so much more it was a promise ring to him , an d in that moment it was a circle of hope..
Trying to control the anger in his voice, his tone softer as he kept careful to mind her space. “ Why won’t you write to me?”
Words like Violence breaks the Silence template made by mikey is a lady killer ?! @ caution 2.0, steal it and she'll send zombie pandas to eat your brains! |
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Post by elvishbanana2 on Jul 28, 2011 9:22:46 GMT -5
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His voice made her want to cry again. She missed him, more than she would admit to anyone. Not as what he wanted- as a best friend. Eli had been infuriating, and sometimes she’d nearly hexed him with frustration. But he’d always been there. When her nightmares woke her in the middle of the night, he’d stay up with her in the common room, smoothing her hair back and telling her it was going to be okay. When she tripped over outstretched feet, Eli would help her up and jinx whoever had tripped her. He’d never left her to fend for herself.
Which, she remembered, had been the original problem.
It wasn’t that she minded being read to, or escorted to class. What she did mind was never being left to her own devices. As they got older, and Eli became more protective, Diana had started to realize that she didn’t always need him. Sometimes, she would have liked to jinx her own trippers, or walk herself to class. She did that now, every day. And she had to remind herself why she needed it, especially on days like this. I can fight my own battles, she thought stubbornly. Just being blind doesn’t make me weak. I have to learn to live with this, or I’ll never be able to stand on my own.
Eli had never really understood that part. All he’d seen was Diana wanting space, was her pushing him away. That wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted him to step back every so often, let her fight for herself- or to let her read to him, for a change. Diana wanted a best friend, not a protector. Then there had been the whole possessiveness issue- Eli took it as a personal affront if Diana so much as made contact with another boy. She was forbidden to say hello to boys she’d known for years, forbidden to talk to them or smile at them. She was not Eli’s personal blind girl. Diana had a mind of her own- and their many arguments had never seemed to teach him that. She wanted to do things because she wanted them. It was freedom; the one thing her disability denied her, and the one thing she fought for the hardest.
Shivers went up her spine for a moment. Eli’s outline was hazy and blurry, but she looked upwards, trying to focus her glazed white eyes on where his face would be. She felt… exposed, laid bare under his gaze, like he could see everything she was thinking and feeling. If that were true, though, she thought sadly, we’d never have separated in the first place.
The chain around her neck moved suddenly- Eli had stretched out his fingers to touch it. Diana could have jinxed herself. She wore the ring as a reminder of her best friend, not her boyfriend. She wanted him back, yes- but in the comforting, co-conspirator way he had been until their fourth year. Sometimes, when they’d still just been best buds, Diana had felt compelled to protect him! His temper was a horrible thing to experience, and more often than not, she’d had to keep him from unleashing the full force of it on someone who could wipe the floor with him. She missed talking to him, complaining about teachers or classes, wondering about how she could fix her eyes, planning Hogsmeade trips and Diagon Alley visits, dreaming about what they would do with their lives once they graduated. She missed that.
Eli’s voice was heartbreaking- angry, but soft, like he was attempting to control himself for her sake. ”Why won’t you write to me?”
Diana wanted to stretch out and take his hand, to calm him down like she had so many other times, to put her hands on his shoulders and tell him he was going to be all right. But she couldn’t. Not anymore.
She looked up, a miserable smile on her face. ”Eli, I tried. But I just… I couldn’t… What was I supposed to say? I thought you were never going to speak to me again. These past two years, not getting so much as a tip of a hat from you… I thought you hated me.” She wiped away her tears, wishing she could make the sticky, pudgy feeling around them go away. From her sister Georgiana’s description, her eyes turned red when she cried, and her nose, and they got all blotchy. Diana looked down, her voice dropping to a mournful whisper. ”I missed you, you know.”
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Post by eli on Jul 30, 2011 1:58:27 GMT -5
| [atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] “No, Diana I didn’t know you missed me.. How was am I supposed to know that.. You didn’t tell me that, till just this moment.” Honestly were all women like this? Did they all just naturally assume that just because you kissed them and such, than you immediately were privileged to the inner workings of their minds? He let out of a long sigh as he attempted to keep his glance locked to the floor and not to her.
“Honestly I can barely sort out the workings of my mind Diana. I can’t be expected to read your thoughts as well. “He chortled off with an edge of dryness. “Please don’t tell me that your love for me steams from my vast experience with the complicated female mind.. For Merlin’s sake, you know who my sister is, YOU KNOW, she has the depth of a babies feeding spoon.” He shook his head at her his anger dying like the dawn of a new day, was he still frustrated? YES she would always frustrate him.
“ My mom sadly makes Emmelia look like a Sodding Genius, which is saying a lot.. So not to defend myself or anything, BUT do you really want me empathizing with that and attempting to treat you in the same way, that I treat them?”
With a dramatic sigh he dropped onto the piano bench next to her. His fingers shoving the letter back in his robes and with another steady fluid motion his fingers dance across the ivory keys of the piano picking out he few notes of Rhapsody in Blue that he knew. “ if that is the case.. Than your lucky I’m not attempting to chew your food for you? “The few notes he played of that all too familiar song stung at him, he quickly changed the music instead plucking out the notes to the score of Peter and the wolf.
The music stopped abruptly as he looked at her. “ What was I supposed to do? “His brow knitted together on annoyance.. “ I thought that was the point of this split? Diana there is honestly no winning with you.. I give you your space and you think I don’t care, I attempt to care and I’m suffocating your independence. Would you like for me to just ask you what you want from me? Would it matter or would you just scowl upon that and find something about the attempt to be disappointed in..“
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Post by elvishbanana2 on Jul 31, 2011 11:52:40 GMT -5
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”No, Diana I didn’t know you missed me… How was I supposed to know that? You didn’t tell me that, till just this moment.”
She smiled wryly at him. ”I know that, Eli. I’m just telling you. I missed you.” Diana heard him sigh, the sound long and annoyed. ”Honestly I can barely sort out the workings of my mind Diana. I can’t be expected to read your thoughts as well.” Eli stopped, chuckling dryly. Diana’s mouth tightened. ”You know I never expected that,” she said gently. ”I’d rather keep my thoughts to myself.”
”Please don’t tell me that your love for me stems from my vast experience with the complicated female mind. For Merlin’s sake, you know who my sister is, YOU KNOW, she has the depth of a baby’s feeding spoon.” Diana heard the anger drain from his voice, and smiled a little, unable to keep the slight concern from her face. There was a tiny crease in her forehead when she was worried- another of Georgiana’s observations. Your love for me… She didn’t like the sound of that. She loved him still- but not the way he wanted, probably. Diana thought of Eli only as a best friend, almost like the brother she’d never had. But closer, somehow, not like his relationship with his sister. ”I like your sister,” Diana said softly. ”She’s a rebel, yes, but she’ll grow out of it. And she’s nice. You two argue too much.”
”My mom sadly makes Emmelia look like a sodding genius, which is saying a lot… So not to defend myself or anything, but do you really want me empathizing with that and attempting to treat you in the same way that I treat them?”
”No,” she said simply, tilting her head to one side. ”I want you treating me like me. Like you did when we were kids- you were nice to me without trying to do everything for me.” Eli sighed again and plopped onto the piano bench by her side, twisting around and brushing his fingers across the piano, clumsily playing what he knew of “Rhapsody in Blue”. Diana smiled and turned around. ”I knew you liked this song,” she said quietly. She heard paper crumpling- whatever had dropped onto her fingers was obviously no longer something he wanted her to see. Diana pushed a few more keys down, following his lead. ”If that is the case… then you’re lucky I’m not attempting to chew your food for you?”
He changed songs abruptly, switching over to a basic rendition of “Peter and the Wolf”. Diana pulled her fingers back, folding her hands in her lap. ”You don’t like the things I eat,” she reminded him. ”You think it’s too much Russian food.”
She was only too conscious of the way his shoulder pressed up against hers, of the way he still smelled like cedar. His fingers pressed the keys haltingly, though better than he had six years ago. She remembered the feel of them- callused and rough from gripping a broomstick, so different from her own. Diana squeezed her eyes tight for a moment, then opened them again. She didn’t want him to see her in pain. It used to be that just the smell of cedar made her heart beat ten times as fast. Now it was the sight of silver, with tints of green and blue. It didn’t mean she didn’t want Eli back in her life- just… not the way he was hoping.
”What was I supposed to do?” Eli stopped playing suddenly, and Diana knew from the sound of his voice that he was looking at her. And desperate. She sighed, letting him continue. Eli wouldn’t rest until he’d had a chance to gripe. ”I thought that was the point of this split? Diana, there is honestly no winning with you… I give you your space and you think I don’t care, I attempt to care and I’m suffocating your independence. Would you like for me to just ask you what you want from me? Would it matter or would you just scowl upon that and find something about the attempt to be disappointed in?”
Diana shook her head, slipping the ring back inside her robes. ”I was never disappointed, Eli. Never. Frustrated? Impatient? Yes. But never disappointed.”
She pulled her cane over, wrapping her slender fingers around the handle. ”The reason I asked to stop… I felt… trapped. What I wanted- want- is not to be ‘the blind girl’ for the rest of my life. I want to be Diana. I can take care of myself, Eli. I want to be able to show people that. I want… I want a chance. Respect. The opportunity to prove that I don’t need help all the time. And I just… I didn’t feel like that was something you were ready to give me.”
She put the fingers of one hand on the piano, but didn’t play. To her surprise, the ivory keys were wet. Was I crying that hard? she wondered, shocked. Diana pulled her hand back. Her feelings were conflicted, now, more than ever. Eli was her best friend. She wanted to patch things up with him- but would that ruin a possible relationship with Draco Malfoy of the silver aura? Confusion and sadness swirled around her mind. There was no way to win.
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Post by eli on Aug 6, 2011 3:40:11 GMT -5
| [atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] Elijah knew that looking at her was the by far the worst thing he could do for himself. Looking at her reminded him of exactly what it was that he didn’t have anymore. To her it was just their relationship, to him it was so much more not being able to hold her and speak intimately meant losing a part of himself and even if he didn’t willing want to admit it to himself he knew the part that went with her was the better part of himself.
Still sadly even though it went against every plan he made for himself to remain confident and in control of his emotions he still looked at her. Her hair still the same style that it had been in since he’d first seen her that night in the boat when the moon had shined down upon her in the middle of that Lake. It was still that light brown color that reminded him of melted brown sugar. He realized his mistake being here with her, it was much too soon and the wound that was over a year old was still much too fresh.
How can I be here with you, and not be moved to tell you what I feel..
But he knew the truth would be his un-doing as it was the un-doing of all men. Love was by far the most dangerous weapon a woman could possess, and even if this one didn’t need site to guide her to mortally wounding him. The truly pathetic part was that he found solace in the fact that she too said she missed him. Something about her finding any part of the pain she had caused him seemed to justify his anger at her a bit, it rationalized why he wanted her to hurt. Truthfully it made him feel a little less like a jerk for doing what he had done.
The latest of his little episodes in means to end the agony she left him in was no doubt going to send him straight to hell, In all honestly he knew what he was doing to Alex was about as immoral as he could get, but frankly he didn’t care at this point he was too far lost in his own misery.. Just like the saying of the old ‘Misery loved company, and he was making damn certain to have it.
Plus this was Alex he was doing it too, It wasn’t like deflowering some innocent random Hufflepuff that ventured too close to him, to him it was a victimless crime, as Alex was about as vile as they came (if you're excusing the likes of blood traitors, mudblood, and muggles) in the scheme of his standards list.
After all one good turn deserves another, and if she was screwing that ponce transfer, like he thought she was.. Than it shouldn’t really matter who he was sticking it too, and how public he was about doing it. But the subject hadn’t come up, so he didn’t make it a point in tempting fate by bringing it up on purpose, even though it was literally killing him to think of what she had done with that suave blond prick, it was almost as irritating as the thought that she hadn’t done it with him first, and why?
However all that is lost in thoughts as she made mention of his sister, and that she liked Emmelia. “ no doubt you blame me for all our altercations.. I don’t doubt as you seem to take pleasure in finding only fault in me.. Trust me I don’t get up every morning the sheer purpose of pissing off Emmelia. Sadly I do it without intention, no wonder you like her you both seem to thrive in dwelling on my faults only seeing what I’ve failed in doing and not what I have tried to do..Ohhh and for the record while you sit there drowning in your personal grudges keep in mind that I would have let you eat whatever the hell you wanted if you simply would have stayed with me.. “
His anger spiked and he got up from the piano not wanting to sit next to her anymore. “One of us fought for this relationship Diana and regardless of my faults I never gave up.. that would be you so while you pile on your harsh judgment put a bit of it one your shoulders too.. Yes I didn’t like nor a lot of your quirks, but I at least accepted them. Which is a lot more than I can say for you.. I’m sorry I’m not 12 and don’t look at you in the same way but Diana men grow as do their love and we become protective of those thing that we hold close to our hearts. Where you thought that love-sick boy disappeared.. Parts of him remained That part that LOVED you did.. For I did with all my core, You needed space I gave it even though it hurt. I never gave up hope.. I think I’m still the same as I ever was.. But it was you who changed, you who needed MORE ” He stalked to the door heaved it open and without a second look back he went to leave her sitting there.
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Post by elvishbanana2 on Aug 7, 2011 10:08:47 GMT -5
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Chills went up and down her spine. Not as vibrant or electrifying as the ones she sometimes got when Draco Malfoy was in the room- but chills nonetheless. She had a vague idea she knew what it meant, and did not like it at all. Eli was looking at her- she remembered getting chills when he had two years ago, though rather bigger ones. Diana’s fingers gripped and re-gripped her cane handle, the only outward sign of her nervousness. No matter where she turned her head, no matter where she tried to focus, jade green hovered at the edges of her vision. A cool, smooth green like mist covering the grounds at the Hunter home. The aura itself was misty- vague in some places, always blurry, and managing to surround her even when he was standing behind her.
Diana felt the sudden urge to run, to leave her bag and her music behind and flee. It was too much. It was just too much. Eli asked too much of her, asked her to feel what she couldn’t anymore. Not for him. She missed him terribly- it felt like a hole in her heart- but she could not go back. Not when it meant giving away the freedom she had fought so hard for in the first place. And not when Eli pretended so hard- or perhaps it wasn’t pretending, she couldn’t quite tell- that he was fine without her. Fine, she mused, if that’s what you call it- all those girls, all those flings and protestations that he doesn’t need help. All that nonchalance, like he doesn’t care- and then the hard words so you can see he does. He’s not fine. Neither of us are.
Her mention of his sister was probably not the best thing to say, under the circumstances. She closed her eyes briefly as he launched into one of his dramatic lectures. Diana was the practical one, the one who didn’t like getting emotional; the one who tried not to let her emotions rule her actions. Eli had always been the dramatic one, the one who couldn’t keep his feelings to himself. He’d made her feel- and she’d helped him to control. But now that was over, and while she fled from her emotions, Eli delved deeper and deeper into his.
“No doubt you blame me for all our altercations.. I don’t doubt as you seem to take pleasure in finding only fault in me... Trust me, I don’t get up every morning for the sheer purpose of pissing off Emmelia. Sadly I do it without intention, no wonder you like her you both seem to thrive in dwelling on my faults only seeing what I’ve failed in doing and not what I have tried to do… Ohhh and for the record while you sit there drowning in your personal grudges keep in mind that I would have let you eat whatever the hell you wanted if you simply would have stayed with me…”
Diana shook her head a little. ”Eli,” she said softly, ”that wasn’t what I meant. I think both of you spend too much time arguing with one another. Whose fault it is, I don’t know or care. I’d just like to see you get along better, that’s all. And as for my finding only fault in you…” She sighed, closing her eyes briefly. ”The number of times I’ve defended you these past two years- even before that. You’re brave, and you only want what’s best for your friends and family, and once you decide to do something you won’t let go until it’s done. I know all that, and I’ve said it for years.” She decided to skip over the way he was overly dramatic sometimes- or the old-fashioned possessiveness over women he harbored. Eli knew those things, too- she’d told him in no uncertain terms many times- and she didn’t think it was best to remind him of then.
Eli tensed, then threw himself off of the bench as if he could no longer stand to sit- or could no longer stand to sit next to her. She swallowed, schooling her face into an expressionless mask. It took longer than it usually did, sadness briefly flashing across her features before she could master herself.
”One of us fought for this relationship, Diana, and regardless of my faults I never gave up… that would be you so while you pile on your harsh judgment put a bit of it on your shoulders, too. Yes, I didn’t like nor a lot of your quirks, but I at least accepted them. Which is a lot more than I can say for you. I’m sorry that I’m not 12 and don’t look at you in the same way, but Diana, men grow as do their love and we become protective of those things that we hold close to our hearts. Where you thought that love-sick boy disappeared… Parts of him remained. The part that LOVED you did… for I did with all my core. You needed space. I gave it even though it hurt. I never gave up hope… I think I’m still the same as I ever was. But it was you who changed, you who needed MORE.”
As he spoke, his voice cracked with emotion. Diana’s voice left her. Fat, salty tears rolled down her face. She’d never meant to hurt him- never wanted to make him this upset. Even after two years, she’d hurt him so terribly that she doubted whether he could ever be the same. Shame and guilt bubbled into her heart, cruel reminders of the horrible thing she’d done. The jade green aura moved away from her, out the door. It closed with a slam.
Diana’s cane clattered to the floor.
She launched herself off of the bench, throwing her arms out in front of her as she ran after him. Her hand closed on the smooth door handle- she pulled it open and dashed out into the hall, then stopped as the dizziness hit her. She was in the middle of blackness, surrounded by utter darkness. The only point of light in the whole world was jade green. ”Eli,” she said weakly, her voice cracking into a whisper, a desperate plea for him to come back.
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